what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize
