just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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