He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
