He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
