tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Randomize
