Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
