Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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