wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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