No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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