Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
