Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
