They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
