If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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