dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You can't special order awesome
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The air was thick with penises
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
