I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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