i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Randomize
