It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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