woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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