She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
