just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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