How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
