I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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