Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize