I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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