Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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