She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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