whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize