Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
