Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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