Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You're earring is so big in my mouth
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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