I cockslap morals
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
i drank out of a bidet.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
