I love black thongs
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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