What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
