she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize