ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
