The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
