That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
