Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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