Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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