do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
