Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
