I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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