I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I could fuck to npr.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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