literally had 100 drinks last night.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
