im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
