how can u be prego again
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
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