Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
