I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
