All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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