literally had 100 drinks last night.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
