At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
