my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
