sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
